Forged and Polished: Chapter Six

Sunday morning starts entirely too early. My mind is still reeling over last night. It's still insane that I went out with Alex last night. It's more insane that it was amazing. It just felt so effortless to sit there and talk, to laugh together, to share some more conversations we could have never had before. I mean, he certainly knows much more about me now than he did 24 hours ago. Maybe I shouldn’t have told him all of the Domme stuff yet…

Chester lands directly on my stomach when he realizes I'm awake, so I don't have a chance to be lazy or death spiral into overthinking. More chores and a chill day is exactly what I need, but first, coffee. 

Throwing Chester off the bed, I pad into my kitchen to see my jacket from last night still on the counter. The memories start flashing behind my eyes. His smile and his laugh are burned in my memory. I fucking love the early puppy love phase. I mean, it's been one date, but it already feels like the puppy love phase. 

A simple French press makes me feel so much more human. I'm on cloud nine, but I’m an addict and need some caffeine to feel human. I finally get to curl up on the couch and watch cartoons to unwind. I definitely feel the stress crash from everything that's happened the last few days, and I need comfort. 

I need to get my head on straight for the next week. Somehow, I need to manage to get everything finished and handed off while trying not to jump my boss. He's apparently made up his mind that we are waiting until after we don't work together to do anything fun. If it wasn't so logical, I would have strangled him last night for it. 

I need a list. My mind is still too chaotic and exhausted to handle Sunday prep without one. Okay brain, basic function. I need you to do basic tasks you've done a million times. Lunches for the week, wash hair, put laundry away, clean litter box, prep breakfast, make cold brew...

Okay that's somewhere to start. I can manage that. Those are all tasks I know how to handle and do without too much effort. I'll start with cooking lunches and prepping some facsimile of a healthy overnight oats for breakfasts. 

The rest of the Sunday is manageable only for my list. Without my list, I think I would have melted down out of stress. I now have to juggle Alex and handing off five years worth of work in one week. Shit just got so fucking real. 

****

I barely slept when my alarm goes off at 5:15. I slept like the dead on Saturday night, but apparently Sunday is too much to ask from my fucked up brain. I just slip into my morning routine luckily. I can't even bring myself to dress up, so it's jeans and a t-shirt for me today. Alex is going to have to just enjoy the memory of cute me from the weekend. 

Everything is very uneventful this morning. I'm trying to remind myself that I have to act like nothing eventful happened this weekend. I have so much to prepare and hand off this week that I really can't allow for too many squandered days in the lab. 

Charlie was already in her carrier by the time I got my shoes on, and it makes me sad. She's also only got a few more days of work. My next lab doesn't have dedicated offices, so she will be staying home. I'm sure she's going to be confused and upset with me for a few weeks. I know she's going to yell, scream, and, likely, pee on my carpet a few times. 

We drive to work with music on and coffee in hand. Every mile closer my heart rate spikes a bit more. I need to act like I didn't just make out with Alex. I definitely can't sit next to him during Monday morning meeting like I usually do. I'll have to stick by my admin assistant. I know she had her grand babies this weekend, so there will be pictures and stories. I can't promise I'd be able to keep my cool any other way.

Pulling into the parking lot, I see his VW. Damn. I was hoping to beat him here, so I could get going without running into him I know I'm going to be fighting the ADHD struggles all day. Deep breaths and then Charlie and I are heading into our office. She hops right out and up onto her window bed. She has to harass the neighbor's poodle every morning. Phoebe just barks and barks while Charlie swishes her sassy tail. 

Before I give Alex a chance to walk by my office, I head into the lab and turn on my GC for the day. I need to make sure I do the mechanical knowledge transfer today. I set this instrument up two years ago, and since it has unique modifications to a couple of systems, I know Jim would break something or completely mess up my calibrations without an afternoon of handoff. That system is my work baby, so I'm not letting that happen. The LC though, he can ruin that. That system can burn in hell. 

Once the GC and detector are on and warming up to stabilize, I can put on my music and make a list for the day. I’m incapable of basic functions without a list when I am this distracted and stressed. I have two hours before our weekly office meeting anyways. If I'm lucky, I can dodge Alex most of that time. Music on. Laptop on. Let's do this. 

I actually manage to focus this morning, so I'm counting that as a victory. I knock out some report edits and manage to do some data collection Jim left out for me on Friday. Just an FTIR here and a GCMS run there. Nothing too hard, but plenty enough technical to keep my attention. I must look focused because I notice Alex walk by the chemistry lab a few times but not stop by which is all well and good. I do actually have a job to wrap up before I completely switch career goals to focus on food science and formulation. 

Those two morning hours go by much faster than anticipated, so I scramble out of the lab and into the conference room only a minute early. Thankfully the seat at the opposite end of the table is still open, and I gratefully sit next to my admin. As predicted, she launches straight into stories of her grand children. One is learning to walk and the other is learning to be an absolute terror, so there are lots of pictures. They definitely have their hands full. 

People are late, as normal, but I feel a faint vibration and notice I have a new text message. 

Good morning from the other end of the table. You're gorgeous. 

An instant huge smiles breaks out on my face before I'm able to smash it back down to a normal happy smile. But not quickly enough. 

"GIRL! Who was that? Your face just lit up like a Christmas tree." 

FUUUUCK

"No one! I promise!" This is the problem with becoming friends with a coworker. She knows me. 

"Uhhh huh. I don't believe you. But if you don't want to share right now, I won't bother you." 

"Thank you." 

And right then, Alex starts the meeting with our normal pleasantries. We go over who's traveling where, what projects are happening, and end with a reminder that my last day is Friday where we will be having a huge lunch to celebrate. 

I can't help but feel so fucking conflicted about that now. I'm really excited to move into food chemistry, but I now have such a huge thing I'm leaving behind. I knew I was leaving behind the forensics. I knew I was leaving behind the friends. I didn't know I would leave behind Alex's smile every morning, not now when it means more. 

We wrap up the meeting, and I have to run back to my office. I can hear Charlie's displeasure about being left alone from across the office. She's YELLING for attention from anyone who will come pet her. 

Turning the corner, I see Alex already giving in to her demands. He is scratching her chin, and she is hamming it up hard. She's leaning into him, and her purr is so loud that I can hear it feet away. He actually reaches down and picks her up for more cuddles. They have done this before. Maybe that should have been a clue. Those two are already buddies. 

"You know, you all spoiling her only makes her yell more."

He laughs and continues petting her. "Oh I know, but she's so cute. And we only have this last week to spoil her!"

By this point I'm standing next to him. I lower my voice and whisper "you get to spoil her whenever you want now, so don't let her get away with everything."

His smile widens, and she looks like she's ready to be carried around by him all day. She really is going to shit on my rugs next week. He finally puts her down and turns to me while I send a quick email I just remembered. 

"So how much more needs to get done this last week? Can I help with anything?" 

Now I'm biting my tongue because there's certainly things he can help with but a lot of them would get both of us fired, and as far as I know, he wants to keep this job. I take a deep breath to recenter myself. 

"Nah. I mostly have everything organized. I think I have enough time to get it all done without stressing. I know you had mentioned a debrief with the polymers team about the status of the deformulation project. Did you still want to do that? Otherwise, I mostly just have knowledge transfer to finish up and some last reports in review."

"Damn. You really are on top of it. Yes, let's do that call. Can you put together just a couple of quick slides about it? Just the status of everything and who's taking over? I'll look at calendars and set up the call."

Charlie has now taken up her usual place on my desk next to my keyboard. From there, she can watch everyone in my office and death glare when she feels necessary. 

"Perfect! I'm going to head back into the lab in a few minutes. Just have some emails to finish."

He nods and turns to leave. Charlie headbutts me as he's leaving. He's wearing my favorite pair of dark was jeans today, so I act the pig for a moment and enjoy the view. Nice ass Alex. 

Jim swings by next and drags me back into the lab. He wants to learn how to do the standard and nonstandard maintenance tasks today. That takes up past lunch, and well into the afternoon. Everything just snowballs. By the end of the day, we have gone over maintenance, calibration, and my data filing system for the GC project. We lost all track of time, so by three, I am ready to collapse. 

I've been at the office since seven and worked through lunch, so I don't feel bad going home a little early. My brain hurts, but we got a lot done. Jim was my mentor when I started here, so we do work well together. We just tend to go deep into topics and talking about life. I'm still worried about him taking over the new instrumentation, but I don't think I have a choice now. It's his baby at this point. 

Charlie is passed out in her window bed enjoying the sunshine, so I have to wake the stinker up to get her into her backpack. To put that off as long as possible, I run over to Alex's office to say goodbye. 

"I'm heading out. I worked through lunch and no one can guilt me into staying later."

He looks up from his computer with a smile. Why is he so damn cheerful right now? He's been smiling all day. 

"Did you and Jim work that whole time? I never saw you come out."

"Uh yeah. I'm a bit fried. I need food, water, and to not be wearing pants, so I'm going home." 

"I approve of that."  The fucker actually winks at me. I can feel my face turning bright red. Asshole. Fucking asshole. 

"You're so fucking lucky no one is around right now."

"I'm not lucky. I'm the office manager. I know where people are."

Okay fair point. I do want to close this door and attack him though. 

"Well I'm going to leave before I say anything that gets me into trouble. Later!"

I turn on my heels so fast. I need to get away before I say anything more. Charlie is awake and walking around, so it's easy to direct her into her backpack now. 

We drive home easily, and the second I walk in the door I put her down and strip out of my clothes. I'm absolutely done wearing clothes for the day. Water and food are next. I'm still too fried, so a pizza goes in the oven while I hop in the shower. 

The water is hot and pounds down on me. Instead of focusing on getting clean though, my mind instantly goes to Alex. I can't help it after years of dancing around each other. I just desperately want him. 

I want him on his knees in front of me in this shower right now. I want him ducking his head under the water while latching himself onto me. I desperately want to feel him devour me right now. Waiting fucking sucks. 

I can't stop myself from reaching down. I'm absolutely throbbing with need. I never usually get this hooked this fast, but right now, I desperately need an orgasm from Alex, so the fantasy of him will do. 

The heat of the water, the steam surrounding me, and the light music I have on just set the most delicious mood. I can't have Alex right now, but my hand slowly swirling around my clit will have to edge me forward. 

Slow, languid swirls build me up to a nice, comfortable plateau. I want to soak in this feeling. Alex right behind my closed eyes imagining he's the one building me up. His tongue carefully moving and tasting me switching between slow, lazy strokes and fast quick ones to keep me from relaxing. He knows just exactly how to work me.

Instead, it's me and my familiar hand picking up the speed now. I can only bear a couple of minutes tormenting myself with the gentle touch. Now I need more. I can't have him tonight, so I work myself high as movements become faster and harder. 

Before I know it, I'm struggling to stay upright while the water continues to hit my overheated skin. I work myself closer and closer, flashes of Alex starting to get drowned out by my own impending orgasm. I'm too consumed to realize he's left my mind momentarily before it comes crashing hard. I actually have to reach out and brace myself against the shower walls to stay upright as waves keep coming. My breath is in short and fast bursts while I eventually come back to earth. 

That one was harder than any I'd given myself recently. I certainly can't give myself all the credit, but I don't think I can give Alex the credit or ego boost of telling him. I'll make him work for it. Soon. Very soon. 

Before I fully succumb to the numb abyss that is comfort tv and my bed, I need to talk to him again. 

I miss this weekend. It was too perfect. 

Dear god who am I? Since when am I this sappy and clingy? Maybe it's just the edges of the orgasm still coloring my thoughts. I can't already be smitten. It's been one fucking date. 

I do as well. Maybe we can sneak some time alone before the weekend. 

Oh I'm so fucked. If I spend time with him alone, the fantasies will not satisfy. 

That may be a bad idea if you don't want to do anything before the end of the week. I just had the most delicious orgasm at only the thought of you. 

What the actual fuck am I saying? Why did I just say that? Holy shit I'm an idiot. 

A minute passes. Two. Then my phone buzzes. 

Oh? Tell me more.

<3 

Chapter Seven